I am a firm believer in the rules of Developmentally Appropriate Practice, in that every child is unique, but that they will all develop at their own pace. So here is my disclaimer: I am NOT comparing my children, I love them both equally for their similarities as well as their differences. And they have a LOT of differences, let me tell you.
In April, my handsome prince and my beautiful princess will turn three and one, respectively. Over the year(s) I have come to know my children better than anyone else in the world. And as a mother, I can't help but think about their similarities and differences, and the rates at which they've developed.
Pregnancy:
Both were very challenging. Morning sickness from day one. Preterm labor for both. With Brennan I took brethene, with Claire I took procardia, neither helped all that much, but the procardia was vastly preferable. I showed sooner with Claire but gained more weight with Brennan.
Labor/Birth:
I was induced with Brennan, had 12 hours of labor and pushed for two hours, needed an episiotomy and tore on top of that. He weighed 7 lbs. 1 oz. and had just a little bit of hair. I was 37 weeks, he was due May 21 and was born on April 30. I went into labor naturally with Claire, and by the time I decided to go to the hospital I was almost 6 cm already. I pushed for 15 minutes and didn't have any cutting involved. She weighed 6 lbs. 10 oz. and had a bunch of dark brown hair. I was 38 weeks, due date was April 24 and she was born April 14. I had Stadol through my IV for both children.
Names;
We chose classic, timeless names for both kids, with family names for their middle names (Brennan James and Claire Madelyn). A sweet little story on their middle names, James and Madlyn were my maternal grandmother's parents, which is where their names come from.
Breastfeeding:
Brennan was easy as cake to get started. We made it to six months before he lost interest in it. But six months was my goal, and I was happy to have made it. Claire was harder to get started. We needed a nipple shield for a while because her mouth wasn't quite big enough to get a good latch. We've dealt with several bouts of mastitis, but at nearly 10 months we're still going strong. Our goal is one year.
Milestones/Personality:
So far, Brennan has crawled sooner and gotten teeth sooner. They are so far about equal on sleeping through the night. Claire said mama and dada sooner than Brennan did, and also says bubba, which is what we call Brennan. Claire seems to be going more toward the social domains where Brennan was more geared towards physical. Brennan walked at 13 months, Claire isn't even close. She is more outgoing, whereas he is rather shy. Both loved the swing as babies (in fact, Brennan sometimes still climbs in it, and Claire still uses it on a daily basis). Brennan was never very interested in a pacifier, we can't leave home without one for Claire. He's a mama's boy, she's a daddy's girl.
Appearance:
Both have chunky cheeks which they get from daddy. Their coloring couldn't be more different, Bren is blond with blue eyes and Claire has brown hair and eyes. Don't ask me how either of them got their eye color, because it's a miracle to me. Their features are fairly similar. Brennan is almost perfectly average in his size, has been all his life. Claire is very petite like her mommy.
Myself as a Mother:
Most mothers say the second is easier, and that they were more relaxed with subsequent children than they were with their first. This was not the case for me. I was only 18 years old when I had Brennan, and honestly I had no idea what I was doing. This isn't to say I didn't worry about him and didn't want the best for him, because I did. But I have been much more picky with Claire than I was Brennan. I refuse to give up on breastfeeding, even if it means mastitis for me. I worry more about what she eats, and what kind of diapers she wears. Heaven forbid she go to the store in a sleeper like Brennan used to. Oh no, she needs a cute outfit with a matching bow to go anywhere. I almost feel like since I didn't have a good grasp on motherhood when I had Brennan that I've been a new mother all over again.
Currently, my children adore each other, although they occasionally play tug of war when they want the same toy. I sincerely doubt this will still be the case 10 or 15 years from now, but I truly hope they will always be close, no matter who they each turn out to be. They are amazing for the ways they are the same, and even more amazing in the ways they are different.
